Excerpts from a 4:16AM Monologue

I don't know if you ever got it or not but you caught me at my most vulnerable. I started to let my guard down because...well I still don't want to say it so… (no, not love, don’t freak out or congratulate yourself) But I trusted you. I really trusted you. And I felt that it meant alot,--given the fact that I wanted nothing to do with you previously. It did mean alot to me. It terrified me that I was willing to let you in again. And I kept giving myself excuses to retreat but naturally I floated into you. The whole thing made my four year protest seem useless, I felt like I was losing, but I also felt okay with it. I thought the irony of the whole situation was the most beautiful and hopeful thing.