Phantom Limbs

I want to be considered as that thing that you lost in a brutal accident that happened in a flash. That thing that you used as a shield during danger, that thing that you used to protect you from harm. I want to be considered as that thing that you sacrificed because the damage was unbearable. That thing that you soon found it hard to live without. I want to be considered as that thing that you still think is there. That thing that you still feel.

The way that we functioned ruined the entire art of us. We were beaten and left broken. Perhaps its now best to cut it all out and off. All that will remain is the phantom section of my tiny thumping.

:')

How we pulled amazing shit like that out of our asses; WE DON'T EVEN KNOW!

Never have I ever seen such a lazy group of people do such an amazing thing. With a whole year to work with, we did nada til the last month. Classes were spent gossiping and texting. Piles of clothes were brought in, never looked at, and forgotten. Lines were rehearsed every once in a while, but its eccentric energy wasn't added til the end. Hours were wasted with group circle therapy. Hissy fits, migraines, shittalk, back talk, replacements. But we really pulled it together.

I'm not in the mood for compromising.

Dear Whoever You Are,

Thank you for your feedback. :)

The last few days have been a struggle

The other night I dreamt of the tide closing onto my island. The only thing that I had in mind was to get to you. There was something that I had to cross off my list. And as the tide came inches closer to my toes, the sky thundered in agony, and the wind blew so strong that I hadn't felt the tears spilling out of me. I stood alone and broken, looking at that classic city skyline.

My iPod played songs of the past as I sorted out my closet remembering each thread attached to some distant memory. I used to think of it powerful, but Sunday made me realize that I'll have a hard time to adjustments.

Mexican food now plays a role in marking a shame. It's hard to tell people truths that you don't even want to know about. Especially when you know that they had faith in that one subject.

These next few weeks will be the last of the four year bus route.

Stress and disappointment mixed together can catch me off guard. My heart stopped, my face turned red, my voice cracked, and I felt the water works. I was embarrassed.

Fingers in your hair

She came into my world with no introduction. She's a friend of a friend; I found this out by seeing them together before I knew who her friend was. I've seen her around since the new route, but I've never heard her talk. She usually wears a tired face paired up with her cool and casual dress. I think I've only seen her in a dress once.

I got used to the thought that I look sad when I'm too tired. But when she walked out that door and into my space for 5mins, I saw deeper into her tired slouch.

It might take a hundred years to grow an arm

I want to have my ol' glow of weirdness again. :)

There's nothing here to hold onto

And now I can expect us to wear down and out, just as we usually do around this time of the year. But if you're ever in doubt of your contribution to society, just remember what we had here. I've been winded but I stood my ground and it didn't bother me.

You have a customized mug of me :)

There will always be one man that I will never lose faith in. This is the same man that I will always- I can't even think of a word. It goes beyond praise, cherish, and love, all mixed in one, holding the intensity of the world.

Instead of cringing at the terrible scenes in The Lovely Bones, I swear I felt something new. A curious wind of hot and cold ran across my left side as I wished for screen scenes to never happen in real life. (If you know me fairly well enough, you'll know what lays on my left side.) I've never felt anything more real.

You're bad news

Anyone else would say thank you! I wish I could hate.

I miss old us

I don't want to know that we're already switching gears this early. We need more days together again. Remember when this time last year we depended on only each other?